This journal is dedicated to a very dear friend of mine who passed away more than five months ago. It’s a long time to count days but the memory of him lying in his casket, the memories of yesterdat when we shared laughters were all fresh in my mind and heart.
7:48AM🖤My dearest xtian, Im sorry if it took me a long time to visit you and not being able to come to your burial. I hope you knew how I grieved for you that I cannot bear seeing you the last time. I dont want to accept that youre just gone. I wish I could see you smiling over me now that I still cry for you. I told you then, your death is more than xomuchpain. And I miss you even more today for there would be no more petty quarrels over birthday greetings. Im only left with memories of you and how youve supported me in every endeavor Id take, how we shared dreams that wont come true anymore. Thank you tian for being my first college friend, my best friend, my brother, my family and all the roles you played in my life. Cheers from Starbucks! At times I still perfectly remember us talking about anything and how you call my name and bully me saying: "Clang, nakita nako imong xomuchpain." Because youd know that a mention of him woud brighten my day way back. And how you cursed my ex for not treating me in a good way and how much you despised me being in a relationship with someone way out of my league. And how much we've grown in the passing years. I still remember how madly in love you are to your girl that you only remember me when you break up for a while but still talk on your plans of marrying her. And who would have forgotten the day we became friends because youve been so clingy since then since you just had a failed relationship with your first love. It was more of my xmp story. As years passed we only had quarrels on forgetting birthdays but we still had silent agreements on deactivating Facebook. And many memories we had, wonderful ones. I hope you know that you are never forgotten.That once in a while when I think of you, I still cry in the middle of the night.I dont cry over lovelife now. You should be proud. Maybe I always miss you and I just dont want to admit it to myself because even if I miss you I cannot see you anymore. I told myself this time its high time to let you go of the idea that I will see you again. And dont worry as long as I travel a lot, I will always move on. Happy Birthday KristianAngelo L. Peñero✝️💟